Life Goes On

After my sister, Cindy, died, I was amazed that the rest of the world went on as usual. This immediate sense of isolation hit full force when, from the window of a limo en route to her funeral, I watched the world go by.

Before the limo picked us up for the funeral, some family pictures were taken. We all looked so morose. I sat in the back of the limo between my parents and held mom’s hand. Her hand was very warm whereas my own hand felt like ice. I looked at mom. She looked at me. She squeezed my hand. I felt like a zombie.

The limo driver was a young woman who took us along the waterfront around Richmond, B.C. Canada.

It was a long ride on a sunny day.

I looked out the window and watched the people, the trees, the water, the birds, everything go by.

Life was still carrying on out there.

Life was at a standstill for me.

I dreaded arriving at the funeral home, wondering what it would be like. I thought, “My God, we will be paying our respects to Cindy. She is dead. She must be. If everyone is acting this way and going to her funeral, then she must be dead.”

Oh God, I hadn’t wanted it to be true.

Melanie Hack
Author of Who Killed My Sister, My Friend
The unsolved mystery of the death of Cindy James

To Sleep, Perchance To Dream

I knew I would be publishing Who Killed My Sister, My Friend one day, because of a dream...

...I am walking under a canopy of branches and heading down some stone steps that are cool to the touch, until I arrive upon a breathtaking beach. On this sweltering summer day I seem to have found my perfectly secluded spot.

Stepping onto the hot sand, I am mesmerized by the ocean's waves licking the shore. My tongue detects salt in the air. The magical pan flute of Zamfir tickles the hair in my ears. I hum along.

Looking far to my right, I see someone already soaking up my perfect day. She is reading a book while lying on a fuzzy purple beach towel large enough for two people.

She is alone.

There is something familiar about her and curiosity draws me closer.

It does not come as a surprise that it is my dead sister, Cindy. She looks radiant. She is so engrossed in a fascinating book that she does not take notice of me until I am right beside her. She calmly lays the book down, turns her eyes to me, and smiles an approving smile. As soon as I glance at the book I know immediately what I will do one day. The book she is reading is called My Sister, My Friend - and I, Melanie Hack, am its author.

She wants this story, this incredible mystery that was her life, shared.

And she wants me to write it. Realizing all stories without an end never go away, I understand the message veiled in her eyes. It relates to how she wrote on June 2, 1988, almost exactly one year prior to her body being found, "I feel a strong need for justice that I have to accept will never occur."

Melanie Hack
author of Who Killed My Sister, My Friend
The unsolved mystery of the death of Cindy James

Did You Know Cindy James?

Imagine my surprise when I recently received an email from a young woman, now living in North Vancouver, who had been a Blenheim House client of my sister, Cindy James, three or four years before Cindy’s mysterious death in 1989. She said, “Cindy told me there were really bad people in this world and that it’s normal and ok to be scared (little did I really know at 4) but that you had to place your trust in someone, anyone. She was my someone. I would like to thank you and your family for raising a daughter and sister that was my safe place. We were close. She came to scatter my mom’s ashes. She was at my baptism. She gave me strength and hope. I could go on for hours. I miss her as everyone does. … I have spent many years going over news clippings from her murder. I am firm that that is what it truly was. Murder. Cindy was the only person I would trust. Cindy gave me the faith to trust. I would love to give it back.”

Does that sound like someone children needed to fear? Would it surprise you to know a secret C-237 RCMP report had stated in 1986, “Conversation with a (Force) psychologist, who does not know Makepeace [Cindy James] but was advised of Makepeace’s history [7 years of threats and harassment against Cindy], finds the following:

“Makepeace … should be considered as a dangerous person around children. … Further, it was suggested that, because she works with children with behavioral problems (Blenheim House), the school should be notified.” Within weeks, Cindy’s employment at Blenheim House was terminated. It is outrageous to think that someone who never even interviewed or spent any time with Cindy, could come up with such a belief and that the police would act on that opinion as if it were a fact.

And I believe that when Cindy lost her job, the course of her life took a downward turn. This was something she never recovered from. Her kids, her job, and her coworkers were her lifeboats in a world of turmoil. Years later I would discover Cindy wrote about losing them--within the hidden papers I found.

This young woman who recently contacted me, haunted by dreams of Cindy since she was 10, wrote in an e-mail to me, "My dreams, she is sitting in her office at Blenheim House and she's petting her black dog saying that she's scared of people too and that it's ok. She repeats this over and over. Others are when she visited my adopted parents house and she was pushing me on the swing in our yard. In this dream she is asking me how the air feels, almost begging me to tell her it's fresh and cool. I truly don't know the meaning behind these at all. As I have said, she haunts me. Or maybe I feel the need to help her the way she did for myself."

If you have any memories of Cindy, or any information about her life and death, please contact me.

Melanie Hack
Author of Who Killed My Sister, My Friend
The unsolved mystery of the death of Cindy James

Who knew there was an Unsolved Mysteries message board?

I had no idea so many people were still avidly debating the death of my sister, Cindy James. I was recently invited to post a message on the UM message board after someone wrote a note to me by gaining access through my website. It has been wonderful to receive so many messages from people all over the world passing on condolences and wishes to my family. I just want to say thank you, and I appreciate all the support that has been shown. I have spent several years meticulously pouring over police files and inquest notes looking for the missed information to solve this case. If you would like to be notified when the book is ready, drop by my website.
Thanks again for your support.

Melanie Hack
Author of Who Killed My Sister, My Friend
The unsolved mystery of the death of Cindy James

Where are you? Are you OK? Are you Hurt?

I just found out that a friend's husband went missing a day and a half ago. An experienced rider, he went out for an evening bike ride in the wilderness and hasn't been seen since. I can empathize with the shock and distress the family is feeling right now, not knowing if he is hurt and unable to reach help, if he is lost - or worse. It is stunning news to be told your loved one is missing. It seems so unreal - a nightmare that blankets you with numbness and fills you with anxiety and panic, while catapulting you into a state of excruciating limbo. Time stops and life suddenly feels as if it is playing in slow motion. You don't want to believe this is happening and you feel helpless as you wait for news. Your brain is overwhelmed with constant thoughts of the missing person - you desperately want to know where they are and you hope and pray they are OK. You experience uncontrollable chills, shivering, shaking - and not from being cold. And you have trouble eating because food seems repulsive. And sleeping, well, that seems impossible.

It's OK to cry - you don't have to hide what you are feeling. And it's OK to talk about your feelings - find someone you trust who will listen when you need to talk.
This must be hard for you. I want you to know I'm here, and I want to listen. Take all the time you need.

Melanie Hack

Author of Who Killed My Sister, My Friend -
The unsolved mystery of the death of Cindy James

Who Killed Cindy James?

I've spent the last two years trying to figure out what happened to my sister, Cindy James. She endured seven years of attacks and harassment from an unknown assailant before her tied-up body was discovered beside an abandoned house. I was devastated and confused, unable to understand what had happened to her, and just wanted her back (if only for a few minutes, I pleaded to the universe) But I found myself pulled along an incredible journey. Not only a journey of healing, but a quest for the truth in what happened to her. I was shocked when I uncovered secrets and hidden papers - information nobody had - and her story was examined at the longest and most expensive inquest in British Columbia history! So I decided to write a book and tell her tragic, true story, just like she wanted me to. You see, I had a dream...well that's another blog. So I'm sharing with you what I learned along the way - what Cindy wants you to know about her life and death - what she wants you to know about your life too - what society NEEDS to know!

Melanie Hack

Author of Who Killed My Sister, My Friend -
The unsolved mystery of the death of Cindy James